Hello again, Tiger fans, Oscar Whiskey is back to write up some more random nonsense that I will then force Chris to read (haha, suck it, Chris). We are two weeks into the #NewDayGusMalzahnathonExperience and would you lookee here now, Auburn has two checks under the win column. If you recall from last year, our Tigers only had three wins for the entire season, and as of Saturday, they have two! That's like a three with a two, that's like being 32 percent away from matching last year's record if you carry the one.
Anyway, it was another great weekend of college football unless you were a Texas or a USCw fan, where ,and I quote, "(Lane Kiffin) put poop all over the field." I feel your pain said fans of aforementioned schools. I know what it is like to feel the way you are feeling right now. I really do. I sympathize and empathize and maybe a little bit of both with you. And the reason for said "symp-empathy" is because you are airing your grievances in the correct fashion; you are being specific.
Apparently during the starting lineup announcement before kickoff there was a bit of audible booing from Auburn fans directed upon their own players. While Chris and Aubielicious discussed this matter accordingly during the most recent episode of The College and Mag Show, I, however, have a different suggestion for those that boo'd:
"But don't boo people, don't boo! Be specific as to why you don't like something! Be specific! ‘The way you play makes me feel bad inside!' Or ‘THAT! DON'T DO THAT! I HATE THAT!' Don't boo! Be specific!" -Zach Galifianakis
Constructive criticism, while still criticism over something none of us are capable of doing, is still better than just heartless, soulless boos echoing across Jordan-Hare Stadium. Also if you have a large amount of friends/followers/sycophants and are somewhat creative, you can communicate your thoughtful suggestions by leading cheers. For example:
"LINEBACKER HOLLAND!" clap clap clapclapclap "LEARN TO TACKLE!" clap clap clapclapclap
"QB MARSHALL!" clap clap clapclapclap "DON'T THROW THAT PASS!" clap clap clapclapclap
"HEY YOU DUMB REF" clap clap clapclapclap "WHERE'S THE HOLDING?!" clap clap clapclapclap
All right, yeah they're the same cheer over and over, but hey, I'm not booing; I am being specific, which leads me to ...
Things I said during the game I have no intention of taking back.
Yep, I said nothing during the game because I didn't get to watch it. Why? Because due to contracts between the SEC, ESPN, FSN and whatever other broadcasting entity the game was blacked out on ESPN3 at least. My only other way of taking in the game was via live updates from services like ESPN Gamecast or Yahoo! Sports app and screw them both because they did an awful job. It wasn't till almost the end of the first quarter when the first update was made, and by the time they caught up they were still way behind the action. Thankfully, there were plenty of other folks to keep me updated like Chris, Aubielicious, thejuiceisgood and my mom (love you, mom).
Now, while I could have watched the replay of the game and said a bunch of absurd things, there would have been no point. I already know the outcome of the game. The whole point is action-reaction, or in my case action-STOP THROWING THE BALL SO HIGH COATS ISN'T PLAYING ON THE DAMN MOON! IDIOT! When I know how the game ends, whether victory or loss, it's all about being in the moment. Because that's all this life is, sister, a series of moments (BOOOOOOO! LAME! WHY DON'T YOU QUOTE SOME MORE CLICHE CRAP!).
Things to make Saturday get here faster.
Yeah, it's Wednesday and the week is almost over, but it still won't end fast enough (damn you, relativity!). So to help you kill the truest, most precious commodity in the universe (time) and also be less productive at work, here are some fun suggestions of things to watch.
Honest Trailers - Jurassic Park (via Screen Junkies)
If there is one thing that Hollywood has truly mastered other than attention whoring, it's the movie trailer. We've all been here before where you go to see a movie, the previews start and you say to yourself, "WOW! THAT LOOKS REALLY GOOD I'LL HAVE TO SEE THAT WHEN IT COMES OUT!" and then everyone around you makes that shushing noise and someone gets the manager. Then after months of waiting you go see that movie and you say to yourself, "WOW! THIS IS GARBAGE! I CAN'T BELIEVE I PAID TO SEE THIS! THAT TRAILER LIED TO ME!" and everyone shushes you again and this time the manager asks you to leave. Well, Honest Trailer is here to help to keep those movies honest. Check them out! Also, if you're more into the nitpicking of movies, then check out Cinema Sins.
Time Slime (Bravest Warriors - Ep. 1 Season 1 On Cartoon Hangover) (via CartoonHangover)
From the creator of Adventure Time comes Cartoon Hangover's Bravest Warriors. A show about animated teenage space warriors who take on the mantle after their parents disappearance into the See-Through Zone. If you enjoy absurd nonsensical humor that makes no attempt to be not bizarre, then this is the show for you. Also, Catbug.
Let's Play - Cloudberry Kingdom Part 1 (via LetsPlay)
The guys from Rooster Teeth's Achievement Hunter come together for some hilarious, poorly played multiplayer experiences. The Lads and Gents have several playlists covering an assortment of games such as Minecraft, Grand Theft Auto IV, Halo 4, Red Dead Redemption and many others. Also, a majority of their videos are not safe work, so plug in those headphones and turn the volume down before hitting play.
All right, that's it from me. I hope you enjoy the rest of your week, and War Eagle!