FanPost

Theory or Fiction-For Your Imagination

Imagine, if you will, a telephone ringing in the background....

Uof F office: Hello?

AU office: Good Afternoon, My name is Dr. Gogue, the President of Auburn University May I please speak with Dr. Machen?

UF: Please hold....

UF: Jay, How are doing friend?

AU: Let's Keep this conversation formal Dr. Machen.

UF: Alright, if you feel the need.

AU: I do, thank you kindly. I have a complaint I wish to make, and if you prefer I can have our legal department draw out a draft, and send it right over.

UF: I don't think that will be necessary Dr. Gogue, please, tell me what's troubling you this afternoon.

AU: Last January we were informed by the Mr. Slive, that one of our athletes may have some eligibility issues. Immediately we began an investigation. It seems that someone not directly involved with Mississippi State, has attempted to solicit payments for the promise of this young man's signature on a L.O.I.

UF: That doesn't sound good Jay, but what on earth could that have to do with UF?

AU: Upon initiation of the investigation we notified the NCAA and of course, Mr. Slive's office. When everything we could uncover was gone through and turned over to the NCAA's office it was deemed that this young man was indeed eligible to compete.

However, we also found out today that a close personal friend of your football teams head coach, has been leaked information for a story To the NY Times. That would be the one that made headlines last Thursday.

UF: Now Jay, if you're blaming Urban for any of..

AU: I am not blaming anyone, yet! I am simply trying to get your attention for what I am about to tell you. Are you willing to listen?

UF: Certainly Dr. Gogue, please go on.

AU: Today, there has been an article published by another friend of Mr. Meyer's and he happens to be disassociated from the NY Times where he worked along with the very same source that broke last Thursday's headline.

The very fact that someone could be printing student academic issues is, as you know, illegal. The fact that both of these problems point back to your athletic department, have me more than a little angry. Do we want an all out civil war? Or worse yet, one that is waged in the public view?

UF: Of course not, I have no qualms whatsoever with you personally, or your fine institution. I would certainly hope that you would never think such a thing of our school as long as I am here.

AU: Dr. Machen, I do not believe you personally had anything to do with this, and I want to believe I am a fine judge of character. I also want you to realize that you have a problem brewing on your hands if you can not get this under control, and quickly. Are we clear?

UF: You have my word, I will get to the bottom of this, and if any of those problems remotely look as though they originated from here, you will not be having any trouble out of the University of Florida like this again.

The above story is just that, a story. Completely made up, in the deep empty recesses that are my brain....

I am accusing no one, nor am I suggesting that you accuse anyone. It's merely for your entertainment.

We're all just trying to have a good time here. Don't be a jerk, and we won't have a problem with you. War Eagle!