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Auburn's NFL Combine Results According to Wolfram Alpha

Where the difference between first round and seventh round might be a fraction of a credit card's width.

Brian Spurlock-USA TODAY Sports

Did you hear how long his arms were? Boy, what a disappointing 40. If he can consistently jump that high, he'll be playing on Sundays. These are just some of the things you probably heard over the last few days during the 2015 NFL Combine in Indianapolis, Indiana. Specifically, those things may have been said about seven former Tigers who participated in measurements and drills as they gave NFL scouts a better idea of their professional football potential.

If you're looking for detailed analysis with awesome radar charts, look at Mock Draftable. If you're looking to get a "real world" perspective on what a 4.4 40 is, look no further than Wolfram Alpha. (Wolfram Alpha is a "computational knowledge engine." It makes absurd comparisons with otherwise mundane numbers. It's fun!)

So how did our former Tigers perform? How did they measure up? Let's take a look.

Click each image to see a the full version. Makes it easy to share on social media. Because how else are you going to tell your friends that CAP weighs as much as 25 gallons of water?

Cameron Artis-Payne Combine Wolfram Alpha

The Willing Banger needed to set himself apart from the rest of the running back crowd, especially since that crowd included the likes of Melvin Gordon and Todd Gurley. Running as fast as a rain drop falls while weighing as much as 25 gallons of water surely did the trick.

Angelo Blackson Combine Wolfram Alpha

The Sure Tackler really opened some eyes this last weekend with his combination of size and speed. After all not every man his size can run the 3-Cone Drill in the time it takes light to go from the moon to the earth six times.

Sammie Coates Combine Wolfram Alpha

Mr. Looks the Part was expected to wow scouts with speed and agility, and he did just that. He ran as fast as a rain drop, jumped almost six cellphone wavelengths high, and leapt as far as most humans get after four whole steps. Wow.

Reese Dismukes Combine Wolfram Alpha

Good Punch was, simply put, reliable while at Auburn and he kept it up at the Combine. He didn't put up any spectacular numbers, but he did effectively lift three dairy cows during the benchpress exercise.

Nick Marshall Combine Wolfram Alpha

Mr. Football Intelligence did lots of things and did lots of things well. He had tip-top numbers in multiple drills. And while he may not play quarterback much in the NFL, his hands can hold almost four and half credit cards side by side, so he might just pull in a few interceptions as a cornerback instead.

Jermaine Whitehead Combine Wolfram Alpha

Scouts haven't had much to say about Speechless, but he did great compared to other defensive backs this weekend. He had the second best broad jump of all the free safeties, going four average steps in just one jump.

Gabe Wright Combine Wolfram Alpha

The Great Explosion showed just how much power he can bring to the game when he practically bench pressed four dairy cows. That was tied for fourth among all defensive linemen this year.

All kidding aside, these players represented Auburn very well over the weekend. Take a look at Mock Draftable's info on each former Tiger. It even includes the 20 Yard Shuttle, which was unfortunately by the graphics team.