When we last spoke, dear reader, I informed you of my goal (READ: #GOALZ) to drop a ton of weight in order to be the same height and weight as mercurial auburn guard Jared Harper. We are now through the first full week of this challenge and I can tell you things are going well.

I gave up any liquid containing sugar (either actual or artificial). That means sodas, lemonades, sweet teas, and even fruit juice. Nothing sweet and smooth with hit my lips until I am south of 180lbs. This actually hasn’t been that difficult. I didn’t drink a ton of sugary drinks, but wanted to get rid of unneeded calories. I should say, it wasn’t difficult until I went to see a movie. Did you know how much a bottle of water at the movies is? If you flew to France, found a glacier off the Mont Blanc Massif, broke a good chunk off it, flew back, lost your luggage because Charles De Gaulle is the worst airport on the planet, and then melted the glacier into your water bottle you bought at the airport, it would be only remotely more expensive than buying a Dasani at the movies. Plus you’d have gotten to go to France and everyone should go to France. You know why French people are so smug? They live in France. You’d be smug too if your cheese was that good.

But I digress.

Last week I did a bit of running. I ran over nine miles in total while keeping my heart rate between 160-180 for the duration of each run. I rarely ran more than 35 minutes at a time, but I’m working myself into shape. I also got some new running shoes, but that doesn’t actually matter in my total weight loss goal. I just wanted some new Nikes and got some for this exercise. Before you tell me I should have bought Asics or Brooks or HOKA ONE ONE or something, just know my narrow feet feel best in Nikes and I don’t want to look like a dad at parent’s weekend at the KD house when I run.

Jared Harper, our tiny talisman, had 17 points and 6 assists against Texas A&M and played 33 minutes. That’s important for two reasons: 1) this is ostensibly an Auburn Sports Blog and I needed to mention an Auburn Sport again and 2) I am going to run 3.3 miles today and will do so again tomorrow. I will run a mile for every minute Harper plays against Kentucky the day after the game and the following day as well.

I liked this comment a lot

I even gave it a rec, which I don’t always do.* I am going to take your advice elcarg4 and set my intentions. The thing I liked the most about it was the part where I make myself feel like I am a part of the team and do a bunch of pushups during the game. So I’m going to do that. I’m also going to be setting my intentions for each of my runs, the intention being to run with a smile on my face the whole time. So, if you see some big dude in dope kicks running slowly with a stupid grin, say hey.

WEIGHT UPDATE

216.1LBS. So I’m down a pound since last week. At this rate I’ll be 206lbs by April 1, which loses the challenge. Time to up the ante this week.

*this is a lie, I rec like every single comment on my own posts because vanity.